When Quitting Isn't Giving Up

This week has been filled with some big learning and aha moments.  For the last 7 months I have been on a journey to learn how to eat, how to move my body & how to make better choices.    I have done this with the help of the fantastic ladies at my local Simply For Life.  During my time with them I have lost 20lbs making my total weight loss 40lbs.  I have learned so much from my consultant. 

Lately I've been learning more about trusting my body, learning to love her & taking care of it better.   Because of everything that I have learned through both Simply For Life and my own zest for research, books & anything data based, I have decided that it is time to close the book on the weekly weigh ins at Simply For Life.   It's time to pull up those big girl panties and practice what I have learned.

So for the first time in a long time, while I am leaving this journey at Simply For Life I don't feel as though I am giving up or that I have failed.  I feel like this leg of my journey has come to an end for now.  I know that if I need to I can return at anytime and they would welcome me with open arms.

It was a hard decision to come to, I feel like I am breaking up with my consultant.  Deep down though, I know that she will be proud of my decision and support me 100% and that if I ever need her she will be there for me.

My hopes and dreams for this fresh phase that I am embarking on are that I learn to eat in the middle, that food is not  good or bad but use it to fuel and satisfy my body.  That I trust myself to dust off my apron and cook my little heart out - that was something I gave up as I gained weight because I no longer felt I could trust myself.   (If you are looking or a new cookbook I HIGHLY suggest Andie Mitchell's - Cooking in the Middle.   I bought the kindle version but now I am dying for the hardcover hold in my hands version.)  That I move my body in ways that she appreciates and enjoys.  Most of all that I am happy, that I can enjoy life and not focus on the number on the scale so much.  Cheers to new beginnings.

What's Stopping Me?

The part that I struggle with constantly is getting (and keeping) it all together.    I get the fitness on track - eating falls off track.   Eating on track - fitness falls off.   I get so focused on one that I just let the other slide.  

I KNOW what I should be eating

I KNOW what I should be doing for exercise

I KNOW....So why can't I get it together?

Here are the problems that I struggle with for my eating:

1.  There are so many different eating plans out there.  Hi carb, low carb, no carb, IIFYM, atkins, paleo, clean eating.    It's so confusing on what to chose.  And let's face it - I like food.period.  Which leads me to......

2. I'm a meal skipper/binge eater....There are days that the only thing that I think about is food.  About the next meal, snack or bite. There are days that I wish that I had a private chef that would make perfectly proportioned, perfectly yummy foods.  I used to love to bake but I don't any longer.  Why, you ask?  Well, I live in fear that I wont be able to control myself and I that I will consume all the food (dishes and all)

3. Then there is my biggest struggle - feeding my family.  A picky bunch they are.  While my husband supports me 110% that does not mean that he is ready to eat rabbit food as he calls it. 

Right now I am just trying my best to not skip meals. I try to stay away from processed food.  To stay away from pop. I don't believe in good food vs bad food.  If there is something that I want to indulge in then I make sure the juice is worth squeeze.  

But really above all - I am just focusing on being happy.

An Inspiration? Who Me?

Last night I received a facebook message from a friend and in it she said that seeing my posts on fitness had inspired her to start getting active again.  I immediately thought - "Who? Me?"  How could I give someone else inspiration when there are days still that I am not even my own inspiration.


A year ago I never thought that I could be anyone's inspiration.  You see at the beginning of this year I started on this journey of mine that was no longer about losing the weight.  It wasn't about being the skinniest bitch on the block.  What it was about was stopping the hateful things that I was saying to myself - believe me even the biggest bully had NOTHING on what I could say to tear myself down.   By no way am I near the end of this journey but I have come a long way.  I don't hate myself anymore.  Now I see a strong, beautiful woman who has fantastic form at TRX ;) I am proud of what I accomplish, the fact that I don't give up as easily.  That I am getting out there an trying new things - old me would have been too paralyzed by anxiety of "not doing it right" to even walk into a gym class full of strangers, let alone going there and rocking it. 

All of these changes make me feel fantastic inside and out.  I know that the inches are coming off (slowly), I don't keep a close track on them cause I am no longer a slave to the scale (meaning I no longer weigh myself at least 10 times a DAY - that's right, day - not month, not week - a DAY) I don't beat myself up on days that I mess up by not working out or eating properly.  If something sinfully delicious is wanted - I indulge, enjoy every moment and move on.   I have more joy, relaxation, patience and happiness in my life.  I have less tears, anxiety and days that I want to bury my head in the blankets and not want to get out of bed.

I now go to class with no fear and worry.  I am not constantly thinking - can my body even do these classes? Instead I go and I simply do.my.best.  If I need to modify the move, OK - If I need to modify the modifier - OK.  Really that is all we can do.   Just try.  Don't give up and everyday we get stronger, better and more fulfilled.    

Some may not like that my facebook is filled with "brags" about my workouts, or what I am eating or how great I feel now. But if I can just let one person know that it's ok and that they can do it too and not to give up then I'm #sorrynotsorry

I used to worry constantly about how others perceived me, worried that they would look down on me because of the stuff that I share on here then I remember that someone else might be struggling with the same thing and it might help them.  To hear that I am giving someone else a little bit of inspiration I was so honored and humbled.  I thank that person for reaching out to me.  Remember guys - you're all the reason that somebody else is inspired.  

Information Overload

The health and fitness world is such a confusing place.  No wonder it's hard to lose weight.  There are tons of conflicting statements that you hear... Sometimes it makes me want to hide under the blankets and just stay there.


How much you should workout, for how long and how hard...
The food you should eat, low fat, low cal, paleo, gluten free, clean eating and this list could go on....
Which vitamins & supplements to take...
Which workouts are most effective...
A gym membership versus the home gym...
To count calories and to track food...
Do you jump on the scale to weigh yourself or do you let your clothes decide...

The research is even more confusing cause when you read about one you seem convinced that this is what you need and then you open the next article and you see tons of great information backing it up as well.

Everyone is different and what works for me isn't going to work for everyone.

I feel like I have tried all the options and now as I sit here typing this I am assessing what is working for me.


In my life right now I feel like I am spinning in a rut when it comes to working out.  And by that I mean - I have no ambition to workout.  Which I don't get cause I LOVE a good sweat.  I love how badass I feel afterwards.  I don't use my workouts as punishment. I always have loved them. But lately, I just can't seem to make myself want to take the time.  Which is completely silly cause it's only an hour out of my day max.  What I am going to commit to is walking  10 - 15 minutes a day.  Just to get back in the groove.  And maybe someday that walking will turn to running again.  I also love yoga so I am sure that will enter in to my plan some days as well.  

For food choices - I like to keep it simple.   As fresh and natural as possible, and if it is packaged - I like to be able to read the ingredients.  

Vitamins and supplements - well I just feel lost on this one - I don't want to be taking a billion pills a day.  So I think I have settled on the following list

• CoEnzyme Q10 
• A Calcium, Magnesium & Vitamin D
• A Multi Vitamin for Women
• A Vitamin B complex 
• Chia Seeds

I also think that for me - I need to track the foods that I am eating to make sure I am eating enough so that I don't go into binge mode cause I have gotten to hungry.  I don't plan on using that tracking to be restrictive in my eating.  Cause that causes binge eating as well..... Heck, it seems like just breathing causes binge eating.

Annnnd, This brings us to that evil thing called a scale.  There have been points in my life that I have jumped on that thing MULTIPLE times a day.  I have finally gotten myself to a point in which I can go to a few days in between weighing in.  I would like it to be a once a week kinda thing......I like to see the number going down.

The most important thing is to do this journey with love for yourself, your body & your mind.  

I would love to hear what works and what doesn't work for you!

It's Been A While

I've always been a people pleas-er, do whatever I can for you kind of person.   It has caused me incredible pleasure AND pain over the years.  Pleasure when you feel the warmth and love come back from the persons who's life you have touched.  Pain when it's done cause people feel they can walk all over you and you get nothing from them in return.  Over the years I have learned to push some of that away.  Those people and moments aren't gone completely but now I hold them at a distance where they have a harder time breaking through my walls I have built to keep the pain out.  Truth be told I've even kept some of the good in my life at bay in fear that it would hurt me too. 

What does this have to do with my weight loss journey?  Well, you see I have a wonderful husband (who also drives me completely nuts - hey no-one is perfect) and two great kids.  I have been struggling with my weight for years cause I always put everyone and everything else first. 

Today, my husband had a doctors appointment for some blood work results.   His tests came back fine but he was told to lose 20 lbs. 

I jumped with joy when I heard this and my first thoughts were well maybe now you can lose weight yourself since he has to as well.  It was my chance to be a do-gooder, to lend that helping hand and to do something for someone else.  For SOMEONE else.  not for me....Why do I depend so much on everyone else being happy.  How do I learn to put myself first?  I need to make this MY journey - he can have his own.  But I want to be the star of my journey.  I no longer am comparing myself to anyone else's highlight reel.  I am only in competition with myself.  All that matters is that I love me no matter what and that I keep getting back up when I fall down.  

How I am going to do this - I have no clue.  But I am guessing that it will be one step (a baby one) at a time.   My first goal is to lost 5% of my weight. (That around 13 - 14 lbs) and my first step to doing it - cut out the pop.  This is always my hardest on to do, pop seems to creep right back up there and sneak back into my fridge.   

Tomorrow marks a fresh start for me - I am getting a makeover - stay tuned for the before and after.  Doing this is completely out of my comfort zone - I tend to be a little on the stingy side with doing things for myself. 

Work What Your Mamma Gave You

I have been blessed, by both genes and gaining weight to have ginormous boobs.  There I said it.  I have been wanting to have a breast reduction done for YEARS.  at a HH cup they are killing my back & my pocket book (1 bra = $80) I actually got up the nerve to go to my doctor for a referral. He said sure but he is going to tell you to loose weight, like 100 lbs.  I was ok with him telling me that.  I am in the midst of loosing weight and that's about where I want to end up.   What threw me for a loop was when the plastic surgeon wouldn't even see me or keep me on file until I loose another 118 lbs (I've lose 10.4 since June ~ Go Me!)  At first I had a pity party - bawled my eyes out - had those moments of self doubt that I would never be able to loose that weight. But then I remember Hells Yes I can do this, I can do anything I want.  Just gotta put my mind and body to work.  I am the only thing that can stand in my way on this.  No one can tell me I won't be able to do it, they can't tell me that it's going to be really hard (no shit, nothing worth while comes easy)

I have changed so much over the last few months.  I used to let my weight hold me back and not be able to enjoy life.  There are things I have never done - so I am making a bucket list of things that I have never done and things that I used to do that I gave up as the weight came on.   I am hoping to cross off one item a month.   These things used to cause me panic attacks at just the thought of doing them.  Fear of being ridiculed or of not knowing how to do it.  But no more. I am perfect just the way that I am.  I love that my body is able to do things that I never thought that I would be capable of doing.  I just love my body period.  Sure it's got a lot of curves, but it's also has some amazing muscles and a hot ass ;)

So here is my bucket list in no :
Tubing
Play catch
Golf
Play pool
1/2 Marathon
TreeGO (its ziplines, climbing and walking along the top of the tree line)
Learn to drive a 4wheeler

I am sure as the year goes on I will be adding to my list (And crossing them off)  And as for those 118LBS,  I will get there one day in the near future.  Just taking it one pound at a time!

Monday Goal Link Up

Hey everyone! Hope all my American readers had a great 4th of July! 

I thought last weeks goals would be easy to accomplish - but nope, I set three and I only accomplished one...Any guesses on which one?

Goal 1 - 1 new Fruit & 1 new Veggie
Goal 2 - Use the bowflex on non-running day
Goal 3 - Call the doc about a breast reduction!

Goals one and two seemed like a cakewalk - but noooooo I only accomplished #3.    However I exercised a ton, used the bowflex twice, dusted off that crazy bitch Jillian Micheal's Body Revolution (They make me want to puke) and ran lots!  

Splurged on some new running shoes cause mine were well used and I don't think they had another mile in them.

My new babies ;)

They feel AMAZING like I am running on pillows.

So here is to a new week.  I have a goal that is going to be tough for me this week.  You see I feel like I am going to lapse into my old ways of binge eating.  I've seen a few pounds change on the scale and I'm all like I need to eat every morsel of food that I can think of.   I am trying my best not to give in.

Binge eating is one of the hardest things I have ever attempted to tackle.  Quitting smoking was a walk in the park compared to this.

My goals this week are

1.  Don't Binge (Easier said than done - but check out my step by step plan to tackle it)
2. Keep exercising 6X a week.  3 Runs and 3 Other

To not binge

1. MFP is my new bff, we are gonna be tight all week.  Logging every bite.  When I get up in the morning I am going to put in all my food for the day including snacks.
2. Drown my cravings in water
3. If the water trick doesn't work, have a piece of fruit or some veggies. 
4. Blog about it.  See that is what I am doing right now - instead of diving headfirst into a bowl of pasta covered in taco'y goodness I am setting my goals.
5. Get away from the tv, read a book, crochet whatever, just do something different!


I want to see a loss on the scale on Wednesday!

Monday Goal Link Up

It is that time of week to revisit last weeks goals!

Goal one - 1000 Calorie deficit - Nailed it!
Goal two - try a workout from skinny meg - there was no new link up this week - but I got workouts in every day :)


It was a crazy busy week of cleaning cause we had a big BBQ here on Saturday.  I scrubbed and cleaned to my little Cinderella hearts content.   It was great, we ate too much, drank too much and laughed too much.  Two days later I don't ever want to see bbq'd meat again.  I am still loving my BodyMedia link! It keeps me sooooo accountable!  The lbs are coming off! I have lost 6lbs in two weeks.  I don't know the last time the scale moved this well ~ I really struggle with staying on track and I feel like now I got it under control!   When you get in a good groove and feel like you are doing the right stuff - how do you set new goals?  Or should I just try maintaining what I am doing?  Would love to hear everyone's opinion on it!

Goal One - Try 1 new veggie and 1 new fruit
Goal Two - Use the bowflex on my non-running day (yes I am back to running - makes my back hurt less than walking does)
Goal Three - Make an appointment to see my doctor about getting a breast reduction!

~Monday Goal Link Up~

I have had a FANTASTIC week! I received my BodyMedia device last Monday and WOW! Can you say life changing! It keeps me so on track.  Worth EVERY  penny! I have hit my targets on it EVERY single day!  AND to top it off the scale has finally moved - I am down 3lbs this week!!!! I don't know the last time that I did that.

Sooo drumroll please..........

Goal One - Be more accountable and log in MFP - Freaking Nailed it!! every single day and every single bite.  Have stayed within my calorie goal EVERY day!

Goal Two - Do something out of my comfort zone - I went for a walk on the nature trail by myself this past week.


 I am so proud of myself!

But my proudest moment of the week came when my daughter (9) decided she wanted to go running with me outside today - So glad my choices are rubbing off on my kids :) Means I must be doing a little something right.

Now for this weeks goals:

Goal One - Have a 1000 calorie deficit daily.  (burn 1000 more than I consume)

Goal Two - Try a new workout from Skinny Megs Wednesday Link UP

~ If you fall down - get up and brush yourself off cause every breath is a second chance ~

~WW Skinny Meg Link-UP~

Sorry Skinny Meg your button should be here but I couldn't get the link to work.....

I Know, I know I promised this last week and didn't get it done.  I thought I would share my killer leg workout that I do at home. This workout makes me want to die and call my mommy to help me.  By the end I crumble to the floor to stretch it out.

Warm Up:

15 minutes on the treadmill, bike or just dance around like a lunatic (I have done the latter).  If I do the bike or treadmill then I will do 3 minutes at a warm up pace, then do 30sec to 1 min intervals of as fast as these little legs of mine will go and then equal amount of going really slow, reapeat for 10 minutes and then take 2 minutes to cool it back down a little so you don't have a heart attack when you step off the machine.

Leg Workout - I use Heavy weights 15lb dumbells.  Do 8-12 reps and do the entire workout 3X

Weighted Squats
Weighted Walking Lunges (20 rep) These are also named "Hell" and will make you want to curse
Weighted Plie Squats
Weighted Step ups
Standing Latereral Leg raises
Standing Calf Raises
Wall Sits - 60 Seconds - You will want to Die

Cool down - For Pete's sake - make sure you stretch that shit out!

Not for the faint of heart!

Monday Goal Link UP

Ok ya'll I am seriously bad at completing my goals! Ugg it is so frustrating. Mondays come and I picture a fantastic goal in my head for the week, write it down and put it out there. Then by Tuesday I always seem to fall off the wagon.   Especially the food part of the goals.  Exercise I am pretty bang on right now.  Like, really WTF?  It makes me question whether I am really committed to changing my life.   I truly am.  I have made a ton of changes over the last few months.  I love myself NOW. Not 100+ lbs from now.  That feels great.  I have stopped crying over every lbs not lost.  I don't stress about it, I am just focusing of actually living and trying new things and enjoying every moment with my family.

With that being said here are my goals for this week:

Goal 1 - Be more accountable - My Body Media has arrived!  I will be logging my food through MFP and it syncs with Body Media - So far I am loving it! A real eye opener.  I promise I will do a post on it later in the week.

Goal 2 - Do something outside of my comfort zone.  I don't know what it will be - maybe play pool or golf or just something new that I don't normally do.

Monday Goal Link up

It's that time of the week to once again link up with Jess over at www.operationskinnyjeans.com



Last weeks goals were:

No Fast Food - I have had a super duper bad eating week,  Nowhere's even close to kicking this goals ass

Finish week 1 of 5K training - Guess I jumped the gun on running -shocking :( I just missed it sooo bad.  but at least I know once it is fully healed that at least I still know HOW to run.  It's like riding a err bike.

So here is to fresh beginnings!

Food Goal - Log all food into MyFitnessPal

Exercise Goal - I made a new workout schedule (I will share the routine on Wednesday for my next link up) and I would like to be able to get through the whole weeks plan with at least one full set a day. 

Now my week will also be spent err patiently waiting for my BodyMedia Fit Link to arrive. I am so excited.  I can't wait to see everything that it tracks and see how far off my estimates were and maybe figure out why the pounds aren't budging as much as I would like to see.  But that is ok too cause my inch loss has been phenomenal! 

PS Follow my blog - I will follow you back! 

Monday Goals Link Up

Hey Everyone.

I have had a fantastic week! I managed to hit both my goals.  Just to recap they were:

Drink more water - Really water is a cheat goal for me cause I drink a ton of it all the time.  However, I wanted to make the conscious effort to do it.

A different workout every day plus swim 3 time - 99%  done.  Got a different workout in everyday but I only got to the pool twice.

The best part of my week......Was being able to start RUNNING AGAIN!!!! WOO HOO! I love to run, it is my therapy, my alone time - It makes me feel like a freaking Rockstar!   Due to one injury after another last year, I have not been able to run in almost 11 months and have done Physio since December.  I finally am feeling like I can start again - Thank goodness! Starting slow and listening to my body more this time.  I don't ever want to end up in a mess like that again. Achilles tendonitis + Plantar Fascitis + Shin Splints is no fun. 

Check Out my goals for this week

Goal 1: No Fast Food - if I get stuck eating at a fast food restaurant my choice will be a Salad

Goal 2: Finish week 1 of my running program & Work up to be able to do a plank for 1.5 minutes

Have a happy week!

#proud

It's a Wrap

Hey everyone.

Monday night I did an itWorks wrap.  This is my third time doing one.  I will tell you right off - I do not sell these, I am not paid to advertise.  This is just my opinion.

My first two times doing one of their wraps I lost 7-9" over all (you take measurements from three areas that the wrap sits on.)

This time, though I didn't lose quite as much. I lost between 3-4".  Will I do one again - sure you bet! I love them.   I love the smell and the tingle.  My skin feels so soft after doing one.  I find that my results last for any wheres from 3 months + - As long as I put the work into maintaining by eating properly and exercising.


I cannot believe I am going to share these photos.  But I can see the difference. I also feel less bloated.

Please know that I do not recommend these to lose ALL your weight. But they definitely don't hurt and I find they give me a little pick me up mentally. Weight loss and being healthy takes a lot of work.  It doesn't just happen. No magic diet, no quick fix pill.  There is no quick easy way to do it.  These make take off the inches but it take hard work to keep them off!

Here are my Before and after pics!

~Weekly Goals Link-Up~

It's that time of the week to set new goals and link up with Jess over at Operation Skinny Jeans.  

Considering how horribly I have fallen behind in actually accomplishing the goals that I set. I figured that its time to erase my slate and forgive and forget.  So I am not even going to review the goals from last week.

I think part of why I have not been as diligent lately is because I am getting sick and tired of swimming.  I love to swim, I just hate that it's been my only outlet.  I like to sweat.  I need to sweat.   My foot is feeling better and I think it's time that I start broadening my horizons and shrinking my ass.

I am going to revamp from the beginning with 1 diet goal and 1 workout goal each week.  

So back to basics on my goals:

1.  WATER WATER WATER - 4L a day is what I am aiming for.

2.  Do a different exercise routine each workout day + swim 3 times this week. 

I am also doing an it-Works wrap tonight - I will share my results and photos with you tomorrow.  Scary I know - a picture of my stomach being share all over the internet.....what am I thinking! 

~Weekly Goals~

My week has been a long one. I have struggled with my blood glucose levels all week. So by afternoons I have felt pretty wretched. However, I did not miss a meal or scrimp on exercise! 

Here's my week in review:

1.  Eat 2 servings of fruit a day - Didn't quite get this one - I averaged about 1 fruit serving per day

2.  Only indulge in sweet treats 2X a week - Did it!!!!!!

3. Stick to the May Ab challenge this week. - Missed two days.  Back at it today!!!


My Goals for this week:

1.  Have 1 serving of vegetable with each meal. 

2. No white bread or buns

3. Keep a closer eye on blood sugars and remember to take Metformin 2X a day ( I am horrible for this one as I start to feel better I get slack on taking it)


Happy Mothers Day to all the mom's, mom's to be & mom's of fur-babies!  Keep it POSITIVE & Love yourself!

Dear Bully

Dear Bully

In public you act like your the cool kid on the playground. That everyone is your friend and wants to be just like you. You think that you know all the answers and you have that "my way or the highway" mentality.

Your "friends" cower in fear of the day that you will turn on them.  Every comment out of your perfectly painted lips is a negative one.

You don't have a flaw on your perfectly proportioned body. No scars of any kind. No stretch marks on your finely toned body.  But yet you inflict them daily on those around you.  Not physical scars but emotional ones that cut deeper with every word you say.

You snicker lazy behind that fat girls back as she struggles to get through the day.  Not realizing how far she has come, you only seeing how far she has to go.

The kid who has scars is taunted.  Not realizing that each of those scars make her only more beautiful

The underweight girl - you laughingly say she is anorexic. She got there because media is so warped that she strives to want people just like you to like her. 

Some will get stronger with time after they have been hurt by you. Some never will and will shrink within themselves until they are a shell of who they once were.  No longer living life, afraid to put themselves out there for fear of rejection. 

Why do you do it? What is so wrong in your life that you feel the need to destroy everyone else?  Every word that you say to someone else is really just a reflection of what your own internal thoughts are. What it really boils down to - You hate yourself.

You need to give yourself a break.  Look a little closer at you - you're not perfect.  Your perfectly painted lips are a little too big, you have stretch marks from beautiful babies that you carried within yourself.  You call her lazy because you feel you are.  You act like you want every to be under your spell ~ But what you really dream of, that brings the tears at night is that you just wish someone would like you for well, you. 

We need to stop beating ourselves and others up. We need to be more accepting and not tell people how they "should look, should act and what they should say".  Your fine just the way you are.  Make choices that are good for you. Eat healthy and exercise - not out of punishment but because you enjoy it.  You enjoy the way you feel when you've killed that workout.  Don't let others opinions affect you ~ so what if they hate your body, your lifestyle, your blog and your attitude.  It's how you feel about yourself that counts.  I wanted to write this after a lot of my soul searching these past couple of months but I didn't know where to start.  Until I looked at this horrendous website that tears down other peoples blogs.  It made me want to vomit realizing just how mean people really are and what it boils down to is they don't like themselves.  I, for one and done with the negativity.  For myself, for others. All its doing is holding me back from my dreams.....Goodbye bully.

Ummmm....Goal Friday....

Ok so it's not Friday but I still need to set my goals for this week.  The last two weeks I haven't done so great with goal setting. But today is a new day!


Here is last weeks recap:


1.  Cut sweet treats back to 2X a week.  -  I Think that I did a LITTLE bit better on this one...Definitely not 2X but it was a bit better than before.

2.  Go for a 5 minute walk 2X a week - Nope, still a little gun shy on this one.  Scared to take those first steps to see if my ankle is healed...Put on my sneakers once and just couldn't go through with it.  I will revisit this one another time.

3.  Find healthier snack options for the family - Done - Made healthy granola bars today.  I also want to try making Strawberry chips in the oven - my little guy loves those. 



My goals this week are:


1.  Eat 2 servings of fruit a day

2.  Only indulge in sweet treats 2X a week

3. Stick to the May Ab challenge this week. 

Why I Ditched the Scale & Fell in Love WIth Me

I've been overweight my entire adult life.   I gain and I lose, I lose and I gain. Over and over again. This go round has been a little different.  Thanks to a few blogs that have inspired me to change my internal thoughts and feelings.


In the past 2 months I have worked on changing me from the inside  - not focusing on the outside.  I accept myself at the size that I am.  I love me, I no longer say hateful, shameful things to myself.  Occasionally I slip cause Ain't nobody perfect!

I try to eat healthy. Cause honestly I enjoy healthy, clean foods waaaaay more than I do that single indulgence in fatty greasy foods (Except I do love a good burger)  I make sure I swim at least 5-6 days a week.  

With those changes - I have have started shedding weight (still no movement in the pounds department) but I have lost 10" off my waist, plus an additional 6" in other areas.

I have let what that evil scale has said affect my thoughts and feelings way too much.  Don't get me wrong I still get on and check what the number is.  But it doesn't control me like it used to. I don't tend to get upset - it's just a number.  The scale can't tell me how beautiful I am, it doesn't tell me how strong I am. I am rockin' this body and I will rock it as much now as when I hit my happy weight.  I no longer have a number in my head that I want that scale to read.  I want to Live my life without limitations that's my goal :)  Oh and maybe to fit my hot ass into a pair of lulu lemons ;)

PS that pic of me is from my family photos in the fall.  I will do an updated one soon I promise!

~Goal Friday~

Soooo, last weeks goal.....

1.  Cut WAAAAAY back on my sugar intake.  That didn't happen. Hello bulk barn. I did however take the time to notice just how much extra sugar and sweets I am eating - I have a sweet treat at least once a day. Crazy how quick they can creep up on you and just how mindlessly you can eat.

2.  Make a food list of my favorite healthy foods and favorite treat food This one didn't happen either.....

3.  Try 1 new recipe & find 1 new "snack food" recipe to try.  I got this one kinda...Tried a new recipe for a Shrimp & Rice dish.  It was ok, not one that I would do all the time.


I'm not beating myself up about this for the simple reason - I am still working like crazy at this....I didn't hit my goals but there is always next time.  I am loving the changes that I am seeing.  For the first time in 6 years I felt confident & sexy in my own skin yesterday.  I looked bangin' in that new outfit (well maybe not when I had pool hair and no makeup.....)




Goals for this week:

1.  Cut sweet treats back to 2X a week.  -  I am thinking that cold turkey just wasn't the way on this one.

2.  Go for a 5 minute walk 2X a week

3.  Find healthier snack options for the family

Check in tomorrow to find out why I've divorced my scale  feel so much lighter because of it.